Friday, June 24, 2011

Separation



My husband and eldest son left me early this morning. When I made my plans to stay in Georgia I was totally home sick and I do find being on Southern soil comforting and good for the soul. Being separated from my husband, however is much harder than I expected.  Since I have been delivered from various hurts, misunderstanding and sin, it has allowed God has heal me and put my feet back on solid ground.  I opened my heart to my spouse and allowed him to love me.  Since then my eyes are open to the quality person he is and watching him drive away from me well it was difficult to say the least. I am so grateful for this loving man in my life. He gave so much so we could be here.  The cost of the trip down, money to live on while we are here and plane tickets home.  There are things he wants and even needs, but he once again put us, his family before himself.



We had an amazing transformation on Father's Day.  Pastor Dan's message was a wake up call for us both on how we live our life, how far we have strayed from the mark in raising our middle son.  How we both want to be the responsible people God expects us to be.  I believe that Father's Day was a devine appointment for Doug and Myself. I am hoping this will prompt Doug to continue seeking a relationship with the Lord and possibly attend church. This move of God in our lives also made me desire to be the wife I am expected to be and truly be a blessing in the life of my spouse.  For the first time in I openly prayed for my husband before he he left. It also opened my heart even further to my Lord and Savior Christ Jesus. I desire to do what is right in my Father's eyes and put away a lot of worldly behavior and die more to myself. This Sunday attending  my home church, remembering how that is where I met my Lord, how in an instant he healed my broken spirit and gave me a new life. Being back in my home church was also a healing experience to say the least, in some ways it was overwhelming.  Pastor Carla is my spiritual mom.  I have so much love and respect for her. And Pastor Dan is an amazing preacher. I wish Carrollton, Georgia would discover the gift they have right in their back yard.
Here I sit in my niece's bed, my two year old beside me, spending the first of the 3 weeks at home but without my husband and grown son, I am grateful to be here, but feel torn into in may ways.  I am so happy to be here, thankful to my sister and brother in law for housing us and thankful to God for making it all happen.  Leaving will be hard, but what the three of us is gaining is worth it.  Our family whole and complete again.

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