Praying in the Spirit

I have been at a loss, over emotional, empty prayers and failed attempts to spend any time with God.  Then I read a quote on Facebook-
"Don’t pray when you feel like it. Have an appointment with the Lord and keep it. A man is powerful on his knees." -Corrie ten Boom.
At first this brought more pressure on my already confused mind and overly busy lifestyle.  But, it also encouraged me to try harder to pray and seek God.  I like to write my prayers.  I have kept my prayer journal in personal letters for many years.  Recently I came across some older notebooks, one dated the year 2000. For me that was the beginning of the roughest years of my life in all ways, emotionally, spiritually and physically.  Starting July 4, 2000 I arrived in NY with my husband, young sons and dogs.  Lonely was not a big enough word to cover my emotional state.  But, I loved Doug and I loved him enough to turn my (and my boys) life upside down.
Since then my life has been a magnificent whirlwind.  Struggling to find a church for me and my sons, in itself, a frustrating and painful journey. Doug had a major truck accident late summer of 2001. The attack on American soil September 11, 2001.  Mother's cancer diagnosis fall the same year and her death February 19, 2002. February 2004 we discovered our church in (going on 8 years wow). My own cancer diagnosis May of 2006, surgery and treatments. I had worked hard and gotten my body back in shape when, much to my surprise, I discovered I was pregnant with our Jesse boy in March 2007. We welcomed him to our family on December 31, 2008 and I plummeted into postpartum depression shortly after.  A time in my life I should have been rejoicing, I had to fight to survive each day.  Here I am, three years later, and I am still battling depression, but I know  there is an end to it.  I trust God to see me though, I will be completely healed and if some reason I am not, I have to trust that God leaves this thorn in my flesh for His purposes.

Back to my journal and my discovery., my letter to God dated September 14, 2001: 

Dear Lord,
I'm still at a blank how to pray for NYC.  Thank you for my gift of prayer in the Spirit, if not for that my emotions would not let me pray on my own accord".
Of course the prayer letter continues on asking favor for our country, but what amazes me is the person I was all those years ago that knew my emotions could and would impede upon my prayer life.  That is why, I believe, we were given this gift...the Bible tells us in Romans 8:26-27  "Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with sighs too deep for words. And he who searches the hearts of men knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God."  Praying in the Spirit is fundamental Charismatic teaching.  How does someone get so far from God that a gift such as this is forgotten?  I have been praying in tongues (again) since last night.  It is amazing the difference in how I feel today.  It is as if it broke through a dark covering over me.  Poking holes and letting in His light.  Why was this not relieved to me before last night? It may have been and I didn't receive it, or maybe it was not the right time in my mental and spiritual life for me to understand or accept it.   Whatever the situation or reasoning, I am pleased that this is the time for a spiritual break through for me.  I cannot recall a time that I was more emotional and I have been allowing these emotions to hinder my prayer life. I am thankful for this gift and I pray I never forget it again.
This is one more reason to praise Him. God does care about his children. He is patient and loving and  He covers everything we need in the flesh and most importantly in the spirit.