If Someone Doesn't Contact You.....

....They don't want to contact you....

This leads me to my topic....as seen in the movie He's Just Not that Into You.  I found it in a 5 dollar bin a few months ago and decided to buy it.  Having seen it a few years back on one of my ladies movie nights, I remembered it being rather cute.  I popped it in the other day and I remembered what I didn't like about it.  But I also saw what I did.  Looking beyond the casual sex, adultery and domestic partnerships lies a rather cute story line of longing to be accepted and loved and the reading and/or misreading of behavior between men and women.
It follows intertwining relationships between friends and lovers.  Gigi is an adorable young women seeking to find a relationship beyond the dating world and finds and unexpected friendship from a womanizing night club manager, Alex. With his help she begins to understand the codes men use (as he has used them too) in the pursuit of casual relationships.

"We are all programmed to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk that means he likes you".-Gigi

I remember the days of dating and waiting hoping that he will call and I would find true romance.  Lucky for me, I found my prince charming at a young age.  I am grateful it is not me waiting by the phone and feeling rejected. The ugly truth is the same today as it was 2 decades ago...unfortunately there are far more ways to feel the sting of rejection...but it all boils down to "If a guy is treating you like he doesn't give a $hit...he genuinely doesn't give a $hit. No exception". (movie quote- Alex to Gigi).

If a guy doesn't call you, he doesn't want to call you.
-Alex

I may not have to worry with  this type of thing in my love life, but I have found the same situations just as powerful in my personal life. Having left my home state, my church, longtime friendships, my siblings and burying both of my parents I have found myself craving deep relationships. For whatever reason the relationship I thought I would have with Doug's sisters and brother did not pan out....I have, however, been blessed with three of the best friends a woman could have and I have a couple of intimate friendships and several meaningful relationships within my church body.  I am an extremely outgoing woman.  Being from the South I engulfed the philosophy "I don't meet strangers". I have been blessed with friends of all ages and diversity.  I have also had the occasional rejection of my offer of friendship.  Although I do feel the sting, I want to continue to be outgoing toward potential friendships as well as nurture the ones existing. I have to learn that not everyone that touches my life will be seeking a friendship. I have to understand that the phone call unreturned and unanswered e-mail are just part of life.  Why I have this unquenchable need to be liked by everyone I meet? That is a question I may never find the answer too, but I refuse to close my heart to the potential of friendship....I just have to remember that if someone wants to pursue a friendship with me they will....